Thursday, October 29, 2015

Inferiority. Do You Feel Inferior?



‘If someone can be lured away, 
they aren’t worth having.’



 Hello all you beautiful readers!!

 Firstly, I’d like to say thanks from the bottom of my heart
for viewing my previous post! 

It has the highest views in the shortest time!
 Well besides my Petronas scholarship post which is meant for all those kiasu determined kids out there. 

*Well I was very much one of them.*

 Hehehe. 
Anyway, glad the previous post is relatable to some. 
Because I personally LOVE reading articles that I can relate to and agree with. 
Teehee.
 So thank you! 
:)

If you haven’t read it, here’s the 
LINK! 


Readers keep in mind that there’s no gender 
specificity here although
 I may refer to the other party as men
 because I’m typing from my POV.
 I think it’s fair enough to say that it occurs to both sexes.
 On equality I’m not so sure, because I have no 
actual facts but on observation, 
let’s just say the species with the higher endocrine activity 
is the one most likely to be the other party. 
The not so rational party. 
*wink wink*

LET THE TYPING BEGIN. 
*JENG JENG JENG*


Soooo.. recently, I watched this show and, the mother of the girl who was about to get married gave her some words of wisdom before she tied the knot and it was as follows:

 “Baby girl… You should take utmost care of your guy’s heart. Make sure that he’s locked down (lol) and he will be faithful to you and you alone. 
Forever.”

………

=.=’’ 

Errrrrrr. … I’m sorry but I can’t find a single part of that sentence that I agree with.

I don’t know about you but it sounds so much more of a job than a voluntary action.

I mean why should I lock him down?
 Like ewwwwwwww. 
I don’t wanna be no prison guard. 
Is that my part time job?
 Taking care of my husband’s needs and wants so that he’s handcuffed to me forever??

Sorry, but I’m all for equality.
 No matter what race, what gender. 
You’re not your partner’s slave.
 So why should you bow down? 
I think a lot of girls have this concept of pleasing their other halves of fear that they might leave for another who’s better.

I mean would you want to dedicate your whole life to someone whom you have to please 
all day errday because of the fear that he might leave you for someone better?

Imagine having to agree with everything he says despite having your own thoughts.

Eventually, you tend to lose your self-respect and feel outnumbered, sad and alone.
 Later which you would develop a case of
STOCKHOLM SYNDROME
YUP TRUST ME 90 PERCENT 
OF GIRLS HAVE THIS SYNDROME. 
I know I did. 
DID. (I don’t anymore. At least I’d like to think so) 
HAHAHA. 

In more technical terms

One commonly used hypothesis to explain the effect of Stockholm syndrome is based on the Freudian theory. It suggests that the bonding is the individual’s response to trauma in becoming the victim. Identifying with the aggressor is one way that the ego defends itself. When a victim believes the same values as the aggressor, they cease to be perceived as a threat.

=.=”

Ikr.
 Feels like I’m reading community medicine where they tend to make such simple theories sound so flowery and complicated. 

Soooo..

In Navenia Nishel’s own words; 

Stockholm Syndrome 
is one which the victim is under the spell of their master for so long that as a compensatory mechanism, the victim believes the masters intentions are pure and actually defend their master’s cruel actions to themselves and to others.

In simpler words, we tend to find excuses for the ones we love to justify the reasons we’re still by their side. 

This syndrome leads to crazy lines like: 

“I know what he’s done to me, 
but I still love him!”

“I know he cheated on me, lied to me but I want him back!”

“I know it sounds totally crazy, but I miss him!”

“He’s not THAT bad. I know deep down he truly loves me and that’s all that matters!”

I know.
 I know what you’re thinking.
 Cray cray right? 
You have it too don’t you?
 Don’t you!?
 I KNOW YOU DO. 
HAHAHA.

PUT AN END TO THIS SYNDROME NOW. 
NOWWWW. 
AND START SPEAKING FOR YOURSELF. 
YOUR THOUGHTS AND OPINIONS ACTUALLY MATTER. 

Before you can do all that, you first have to reach in and find your inner self confidence.

STEP ONE:

You have to BELIEVE AND TRUST 
that you can live and breathe on your own without him in your life.
He isn’t your life support baby. 
You gotta be your very own life support system!

Like the song by LeAnn Rimes, 
“How do I live without you?”
Nonsense.
YOU CAN LIVE WITHOUT ANOTHER PERSON HELLOOOOO. 
Then what have you been doing all your life before you met this “one true love” of yours?? 
Please don’t say you were dead and was resurrected when he came along. LOL. 
"How do I breathe without you?"
Yup that’s oxygen. 
NOT HIM.

NEXT STEP:

CONFIDENCE

NEVER THINK THERE’S SOMEONE OUT THERE WHO IS BETTER THAN YOU.

You got to be confident enough to think that you’re the best. 
I guess many of us girls these days tend to compare one another by looks because basically that’s the first sense we use before knowing the person. 
Our sense of sight
But there’s SOOOOOOO SOOOOOO much more to a person than just looks. 
You might be up against Miss Universe for all you know but so what???

 You may be better in so many other aspects like
morals, intelligence, cooking skills, family values etc etc. 
So yeah, you’re already a winner in other aspects. 
You’re already the best in your own eyes and if your partner can’t see that and is dumb enough to only use his eyes or more precisely his male organ, 
then let’s give him a standing ovation.

Now now , don’t go creating a superiority complex and place yourselves on golden pedestals and start treating everyone else like how Draco treats Mudbloods or how nefarious kings treat their peasant scums my darling readers and later blame nananishel.blogspot.com for encouraging you to have what they say as
 “an exaggerated opinion of oneself.

Wiki describes it as:
“ A subconscious neurotic mechanism of compensation developed by the individual as a result of feelings of inferiority. The feelings of inferiority in this specific complex are often brought on by real or perceived social rejection”.

……………..

Everything in moderation baby. 
 I REPEAT!
 Moderation. 
Being a little narcissistic is beneficial ya knowwww. 
JUST A LITTLE. 
*wink wink* 

Thinking out loud : 
 Yikes. What have I doneeeeeeeee. 

Hahaha. 

On the opposite end of the spectrum, 
To be exact, the more run-of-the-mill end of the spectrum,
 most people suffer from inferiority complexes mainly as a result of their past.
 Be it being bullied, being never good enough, always compared by people you care about (eg; family)..

Remember, if so.. Cinderella would have died being constantly tyrannized by her stepmother/ stepsisters. 

Would she have gone to the ball if she died? 
Would she have met Charming if she died? 

*Imaginary audience screams* :
 NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Hahaha.

Another common reason for  losing self confidence is being left/cheated/put down by the one you thought was your one and only.

Your ego gets hurt and you begin to question yourself. 
You tend to wonder if you are as great of a catch as you thought you were especially when you thought you were the most awesome girl in all galaxies. 
But he made you feel like you’re worse than faeces of all kinds of species on planet Earth.

 Mmhmmmm. Guys do that.
*nods head in a bimbo way* 
LOL.  

On a serious note, just remember that whatever those poor uplifted souls’ actions were, they are not a reflection of you nor your value as a person.

Their actions reflect only their personal momentary lack of

INTEGRITY, MATURITY, LOVE AND MAINLY COMMON SENSE. 

*self applause woooooo!*

.

Ok so back to the topic of equality.

So once you know that you’re the best out there and know that it is his loss for not having you, then only can you understand the concept of equality. 

A relationship between two individuals should be complementary . 
You both should benefit each other in your own respective ways 
and ultimately reach happiness together. 

You should guide each other without anyone feeling inferior or superior to the other person. If you love someone, don’t try to be a tyrant. 
Your girl isn’t a country and you’re most defo not Hitler. 
And I’m not blaming it all on Hitler,
 sometimes girls like being ruled by the modern day Hitlers out there. 

With 50 shades of Grey being a worldwide phenomenon, I see no surprise there.
 Nah uh.

*This writer apologises as this blog is strictly based on conventional-old-school relationships ONLY.*

TEEHEE.

So anyway, we girls aren’t your compasses guys c’mon.
We’re your teammates.
If we’re gonna get lost, we get lost TOGETHER.
We’ll guide one another to the pinnacle TOGETHER.
We’re finishing the climb to the top TOGETHER.
Both respectively having anticipation to reach the peak and of being fearless TOGETHER. 
.
.
.
Let me repeat, TOGETHER.

We aren’t like compasses that you use when you’re lost or desperate and when you’ve found another route, its ADIOS, I don’t need you no more.

That’s sad don’t you think ladies? 

Now do you want to be a compass?? 
Do you want to be under Hitler and be tortured mentally all the time?
 And to some out there who’s going through this situation, do you FEEL like a compass?
 Do you feel used?
 Stepped on?
 Inferior?  
Emotionally blackmailed? 
Scared that he might leave? 
Scared that he might fall for that girl next to him at work? 
Afraid that one day he might fall out of love with you because someone else might win his heart because you’re not good enough? 

Remember this:

‘If someone can be lured away, they aren’t worth having.’

I know some of you may say that you constantly oblige in the name of LOVE. 

Name of love now is it? 
You better redefine what love is to you then honey.
 At least to me, I may not be a love expert but at least I can tell you what love shouldn’t mean. 

Love shouldn’t mean fear.
Love shouldn’t mean being okay with your partner constantly threatening you to end the relationship/ giving you the cold shoulder if you don’t play by their rules.
Love shouldn’t mean being afraid to voice out your opinions.
Love shouldn’t mean being verbally abused/ disrespected no matter how difficult any situation is.
.
.
.

And the list goes on.

If you’re constantly emotional while being in a relationship, 
I strongly suggest you rearrange your definition of love. 

And drill these words into your heads:

I AM GOOD ENOUGH. 
I DO NOT HAVE TO CHANGE FOR ANYONE.
 I’M PERFECT THE WAY I AM. 
AND IF YOU OR ANYONE ELSE FOR THAT MATTER CANNOT SEE THAT, CANNOT APPRECIATE THAT, AND IF IT’S NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU, 
IF I’M NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU, 
THEN BY ALL MEANS, WALK AWAY.

I mean RUN away. 
LOL. 
Walking is a little too slow, the jerk might catch on. (hehehe)

So what are you guys waiting for? 
Now get your Usain Bolt on and leap away! 
To the kingdom FAR FAR AWAYYYYY.  
Until you see Prince Charming. 
Oops. I mean Shrek and Puss in Boots.
 LOL. 
Since Charming himself is cuckoo if you know what I mean. (Shrek 2 in case you’re blur.)

TEEHEEEEE.

.

Soooo.. That’s all for now babies!  
I’m supposed to blog bout my North India trip, but it’s pending until nowww.. 
GRRR SOOOO LAZEEEEEEEEYYYYY. 
But a blogger’s gotta do what a blogger’s gotta do
HAHAHAHA  MELEBIH.
 I actually mean I gotta get it up before all the visual memories fly away. 
And there’s nothing to look back on when I return to Malaysia in the future.

AHHHHH MALAYSIAAAAAA OH TANAH AIRKUUUUU.
 Going cucks.
 I feel zombie-fied. 
I need you nowwwww. 
I need my soillllllll. My Malaysian soillllllll. 
I need to go HOMEEEEEE. 
*drama game strong*

TEEHEE.

Anyways, Stay tuned for that post aite! 
I’m gonna make you fall in love with India. 
That’s a promise.
 *wink wink* 

Sending out love.

KISS KISS. 

x

Signing out, 
N.


*completely unrelated picture* 

But one of my favourites! hehehe.
Guess I must have improved by 1 percent in the relationship part of my life. 
Because I'm more than happy.
:)


ciao.

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